THIS WOMAN made her partner, who is THIRTY-FIVE years older than her, promise to get a vasectomy reversal before agreeing to date him.
Flight attendant Nena Zahed (25) from Florida, USA, met her partner, nephrologist Jose Martinez (59), at a restaurant in Downtown Orlando in June 2020. Despite not knowing each other, Nena struck up a conversation with Jose whilst at the bar where they chatted for hours.
They exchanged numbers and several days later, they met up for their first date. At first, the duo knew that they liked each other and wanted to meet up again – but assumed the relationship would be very casual due to their 35-year age gap.
During one of their dates, Jose informed Nena that he didn’t want to get married and also had a vasectomy – a surgical procedure that sterilises a male. For Nena, getting married and having kids were two of the most important things that she wanted out of life and she didn’t see the relationship between them going anywhere due to this.
Regardless, they felt an attraction to one another and continued seeing each other every few months. Although the age difference made them both feel rather skeptical about their relationship and feelings, Jose started falling in love pretty quickly and Nena realised she had fallen in love after three months of dating.
They decided to tell their family and friends once their relationship started to get serious in September 2020, where Jose’s friends and family were extremely supportive. Despite Nena’s friends accepting their relationship, her family haven’t accepted her newfound love besides her sister, Nay (29) who is extremely happy for them.
The duo believe they are best friends and as Jose treats Nena like a princess by surprising her with romantic gifts such as flowers, Nena also treats Jose like a king. Nena believes she has shown him a new way of life and has helped him to come out of his comfort zone.
After four months of dating, the duo decided to move in together once their relationship had reached new levels. Although the two have had their doubts about their relationship, they are now planning in the near future to get engaged and hope to tie the knot shortly after.
Having a family is their number one priority after Jose’s vasectomy reversal as the couple want to experience life together for many years to come.
Jose mentioned that he didn’t want to get married and that as he had a vasectomy, he wouldn’t be able to have kids
“Myself and Jose met at a restaurant in Downtown Orlando in June 2020. We were both at the bar when I struck up a conversation with him,” Nena said.
“We chatted there for a while and exchanged numbers. A few days went past and I reached out to him, where we set up our first date.
“We didn’t feel love at first sight despite really liking each other. I was intrigued to see him again, but we thought our connection would be something very casual.
“During one of our dates, we got to talking about our futures where Jose mentioned that he didn’t want to get married and that as he had a vasectomy, he wouldn’t be able to have kids.
“After that, I didn’t really see the relationship going anywhere as marriage and kids are two of the most important things to me.
“We continued to see each other every few months after this, but despite our attraction to one another, the age difference definitely made us both quite sceptical of the relationship going anywhere serious.
“After taking a trip around Florida, I could tell that Jose was falling in love with me. I think he realised that I was a lot more apprehensive, but after three months, I couldn’t hide my feelings for him any longer.”
Jose was drawn in by Nena’s beautiful looks and extremely outgoing personality. For Nena, Jose’s shy side intrigued her, as well as his dress sense as he wears very loud colours and his intelligence made her swoon.
“There’s a thirty-five year age gap between us, which was a struggle for Jose to get over at first as people kept staring at us each time we were out in public,” said Nena.
“I have dated older guys before, so I wasn’t too fussed – but even thirty-five years was a bit of a push for me at the beginning.
“However, we get along so well – he’s the best friend I’ve ever had. We do most things together and Jose treats me like a princess by surprising me with romantic gifts such as flowers.
“I also treat Jose like the king that he is by surprising him with things like an indoor picnic which I did for our anniversary, as well as other little gifts.
“I’ve also shown him a new way of life, which has helped him to come out of his comfort zone – which erases any doubts that we had.
“We told Jose’s family and friends in May 2020 who were really supportive. Due to this, I went on to tell my family and friends.
“Despite my friends being happy for us, my family weren’t very accepting besides my sister – which I’m not too fussed about, as I’m not that close to my family.
“I moved in with Jose after around four months of being together, which has been so fun and neither one of us have ever been so excited to come home to someone in a very long time.
“For the future, we’re planning on getting engaged and hopefully married soon after. Starting a family is very high up on our priority list and I think if Jose wasn’t open to getting a vasectomy reversal, we wouldn’t have made it as a couple.
“If the vasectomy reversal fails for any reason, we will likely pursue IVF if needed. We want to be able to have a family together, which most people think is crazy.
“People don’t understand why Jose is having a baby so late and they don’t understand why I want to have a baby with someone who is far older than me – but we feel connected like soulmates and want to experience having a family together.”
Jose and Nena decided to share their age gap journey on Instagram, @thirtyfiveyearsapart, in a bid to show the world that age gap relationships are normal and that intergenerational dating shouldn’t be such a taboo.
“We also wanted to meet other couples and people online who are in a similar boat to us and although there are tonnes of haters and people who like to criticise us, the outpour of support extends greater than the hate,” said Nena.
“Most people are extremely supportive and kind, where we have been left comments such as, ‘You guys look so happy,’ and, ‘Beautiful couple.’ Although there are the odd few comments such as, ‘She’s a gold digger,’ and, ‘He’s a sick old man’ – which disgust us, as we’re not hurting anyone.
“You need to be with someone who makes you happy – no matter the age, gender, height, sexual orientation. You only have one life to live, so make it count.
“Don’t let anyone’s negative opinions influence your choice to be happy as those who have negative comments to say about you and your happiness, should not be included in your life.
“This has been the best experience of our lives and we can’t wait to see what the future has in store for us.”
