Your parents divorce is not all bad news, though. Cribb says that adult kids are more resilient to the emotional effects of their parents’ divorce because they’ve developed a sense of identity, their own support systems and the ability to see the split from a rational level.
“Because they have their own lives, they’re less prone to feeling abandoned or rejected by one parent than a child would be. They may also have had their own experiences with ending relationships or falling out of love, so they better understand the decision the parents have made.” And, of course, with any challenge comes an opportunity to grow and learn, and that is exactly what Lily has done in the five years since her parents broke up.
“I’ve learnt many things from their mistakes; mainly that honesty and communication is the key to a healthy long-term relationship.”
Psychologist Gemma Cribb says some adult children will find it difficult to distance themselves from their suffering parents, especially if one is isolated or has few other support systems. In this situation, she suggests being assertive and setting boundaries so you’re not being overly drawn into your folks’ neediness. “Make sure your parents know you love them both equally, and correct any wrong assumptions they might make
What to expect as an adult when your parents are having a divorce – Part 1
